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Long long tym,no blogging ,no work ...what to start off with?? I think there would be no other inetersting topic than campus placemnts.
campus placements...after a long recession ..which of course seemed longer than it was expected to be ,well ,placements are back now.
Well i dint have the desire to appear any interview(though i had attended PI/GD classes) at Confidence Factory,where they teach you how to appear for interviews.
Interviews are basically fucking sessions ,where they try to rape you and you defend yourself,save your ass from a bunch of assholes.(This is my notion ,it might change when I become an HR myself)
What a week,I am tired as if I am fucked by a TRAIN.TATA STEEL,TCS all took my interview .Let me discuss about TCS,a fucking company ,with a fucking payscale,only to be resorted to,when you are preparing for MBA.
It was the best for me.Cracked the 1st round easily(while others went in for online dictionary for antonym,synonym and stuffs),i made it without any copying or cheating..hahaha a RARE thing to do ..when i am concerned.
Interview process:TCS ID from 1-180 were called in.made to sit inside a LAB in campus no. 6.Wow,i saw many faces for the first time,some pretty ones,and I think I had to exercise greter control ,greater restraint on my dick.The M tech girls were just too pretty.
I should stop now.Interview process started ,18 panels 326 students.3 panels were REJECTION PANELS .
first student got in.She was asked only technical questions,no HR.
She came out crying.
It was a bad news.
lets move forward ..I was called to Panel 18,last one..was 2nd in the panel.1st student was interviewed for about 30-40 minutes.
When he came out he told that he could not give a single answer,he had been asked about JK,SR flipflops ,hahaahhaa fucked hard.
Now my turn.hmmm
let us call that interviewer as M.
me:may I take the seat SIR?
M:yes.
M:so SAMBIT tell me something about yourself.
me:I am SAMBIT RATH pursuing BTECH in CSE in KIIT iuniversity.Passed my 12th from BJB college BBSR.I am basically a hardworking guy,now residing with my parents. I like to read books and watch inspirational movies.
M:watch movies huhh?? Which was the recent movie you have watched?
me: (TRump CArd)Sir, this ws recomended by a friend long tym ago.But watchd it jus some tym ago.then SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION .....blah ...blah....blah
M:Wht if you are imprisoned like the hero in the movie???
me:I would definitely fight back and escape,even if I don't succeed..I would definitely give it a try.
M:Do you know Neeraj Kumar??He jus had an interview,is he a friend of urs???
me:Yes,sir he is(Common man, even if u don't know a person tell Yes,you are nt going to be asked abt his b'day and his likes and dislikes,you are his FRIEND after all,not his GAY partner)
M:Well Sambit..Is he a Better student than you???
me:yes sir, he is...
(a mistake....u are likely to get screwed...IDEAL answer :Sir,is it is up to you decide,i don't have the capacity to judge others,i only know my strengths and weaknesses)
then i gt screwed
M:so.what if I pay him 6 lpa and u are paid 2 LPA???
me:(son of a bitch..Hurt my ego..)well sir it is up to u to decide that
M:but you say that He is better??
me:(fucked man..its like you are being fucked in the ass with ur own dick)
Yes Sir he is ,but I think at times i can also perform better than any other individual.
(Stuck to the original answer)
M:so,if he is a better student than you.then how come you have a CGPA of 9.14 and he has a CGPA of 8.xx???
me:Sir ,it depends on time and luck,I secured around 9.5 a couple of occasions.
Its good that the interview was already 10-12 minutes old by this time...
M:so,do u have a girlfriend???
me:no,sir....
M:do you have any problems?????i mean .....
(motherfucker, haraamkhor .@##$$ saale ne leli meri, IDEAL ANSWER should have been "no,sir....but i am open to it,i think i am not yet ready") .
M:so SAMBIT,why don't you have a Gf?
( Then I acted as if I was defeated)
me:tried Sir,and failed...I was late.
M:so SAMBIT u mea to say that all girls are committed,and u could not find one???
me :YES sir...("saale sexual pervert fuk u")
M:what is the ratio of boys to girls in ur class??
me:sir 7:3
M:still no GF??what were u doing man??? only getting marks??
me:sir u need ti invest a lot of time to maintain a GF.
M:who is ur TOPPER??
me :anurag sharma,9.77 cgpa
M:well lemme check..its good that he is not there ..he is lucky...
(YOU ARE LUCKY POOR BASTARD HE WOULD FUCK YOU AND TELL U STUFFS WHICH WOULD BLOW UR BRAINS OUT)
M:so does that boy have a GF?
me:yes sir...
M:so, u say you need to have time,how does that guy manage his time
This time I had no answers..I showed him my TEETH..well I had no answer to this question
M:so sambit,suppose u are offered JOB at ORACLE ,IBM, TCS then which one would you prefer????
(any campany other than TCS man ,haha)
me:TCS sir,(..again screwd...IDEAL ANSWER:"I would ask my seniors then arrive at any conclusion "..hmmm ...got fucked again..)
M:why man I also don't think TCS is in their League why are u lying to me???
me:(I realized the mistake, common man do something.....common ..save ur ass)Sir TCS is the largest software giant of INDIA,blah ..blah.....
M:but those companies are giants of the whole world...
me:(felt like abhimanyu surrounded by tricky questions...then it CAME)Sir,it is a honour for me work with TATA ,my family would be more pleased if I worked here,than in any foreign campany..(sense of national PRIDE,hahahah)
M:so you want the name of TATA???why??morever you have a CGPA and stanadard to make it into them...why TATA??
me:(well this tym i was not stupid enough) SIR, TATA is a famous household name in INDIA. A person to exposed to TATA from the time he is borne ,to the time he closes his eyes.Well sir when a child plays he sees TATA trucks,returns home eats TATA salt
TATA rods,steel,TCS,TCE,tata airlines,jewellary (tanishq),TITAN WATCH,tata mc-grawhill books,IISC bangalore,TISS,tata memorial hospital for cancer patients...these are some of the the gifts which the TATAs have bestowed upon onto us.
M:(got impressed I think)sambit ,I want to insert an ELEPHANT into a FRIDGE ??how am I supposed to this??
me:the elephant must be small,a toy elephant i suppose,we are going to put that in.
M:no its not small...
me:then we manufacture a huge fridge abt the same size as that of the elephant....then..
M:no we can't do that..can you do it or not??
me:(could handle no longer)i am going to beat it and make it smaller and insert it..
("fuk u....i am going to insert my rod into ur mouth ....kamina saalaa").
M:well SAMBIT lets get this straight u are very good with ur communication..i like ur accent..I will give you an excellent grade for this..but I won't recomend your name as I have done for your friend.
me:(saale, itna maara ,abe meri maa behan ek karega kya ??? )why sir??
M:because I think u are only good with words.u are not good wid ur subjects
me:no sir ,I am
M:what are ur subjects in 7th sem??
me:(BAAP RE,7th sem subjects were never meant to be asked )sir ACA(computer architecture),CNS(networksecurity),HRM(humanresourcemgmt)
M:can ask you from ACA??
me:no sir, I am nt comfortable
M:why not???
me:(maar liyaa saale ne,i showed my smiling face but not effective.)
M:lemme ask you
me:really sir ,its a tough subject and I am not comfortable wid it
M:so inside the company when I ask you to switch jobs you might say this that you are not ready.
me:sir I will do that sir,i will struggle to avchieve that
M:why not now??RISC vs CISC,common explain that
me:wow i knew 3 points, answered
M:tell me abt project
me:explained.
he wasn't satisfied
M:I think u have copied..this wasn't ur project
me:(this is the limit,i knew he was trying to stress me out,i was n't going to give up never ,already half an hou had passed be cool,i told my self)
M:look u need knowledge about 3 languages I dont find u know even one
me:sir I know JAVA(core),C,C++,SQL
M:then he threw bouncers
1.you did ur projects in java,so if it was C++, how would you implement it??
2.difference between windows xp,vista,2003??
3.what are u learning man???
gone case..
M:so do u know encryption algos??? what is cryptography?
me:answered
M:tell me some algos
me:DES ,IDEA, BLOWFISH
M:what is DES
(arey this was a 6 page theory ....)
me :data encryption standard sir
M:explain
me :can't sir ,its too long
M:look ,what if I throw you out right now??
me:sir it would hurt me the most ,but I don't take setbacks as failures and I will try for the next one.SIr I had preapared much and it would definitely hurt me.
M:on one side you tell that you are prepared,and on the other side u show your level of preparation like this?you don't know c++,no DES,no CSA
me:can I borrow that paper??
M:yes you can
I did something which I could have only imagined ..took the paper took a pencil from the table,started drawing DES,i don't know how I rememberd it,64 bit key ,discard 8 bits now a 56 bi tkey .take 64 bit plain text,divide into 2 parts,expansion permutation,S-box,P-box..i explained..HE WAS GONE NOW.
hahaah
M:so you basically mug up things huhh??
me:(abe phir se ,teri maa ki) no sir I am equally good in all subjects,its just that i know certain things
M:so C++?
me:i told him what I knew.
M:should I ask u more???
me:(i knew I was in..after a gruelling 5 minute theory session ..)sir .....if you ask me i would definitely try to answer.
M:like you have answered everything,(made a mocking face)
me:(kept quiet)
M:any questions for me?
me:sir if I get selected what would be the prerequisites?what should I study beforehand when I join??
M:he started..told me abt problems of industry,employees,told me to start from basics,study java net beans,eclipse,complete dot net.
Then ,he also gave me my feedback ..
He told me i never inetnded to ask u ACA ,its the most difficult subject anyone can handle,When you were reluctant I knew that this child has struggled with the subject.
at last...a confession..i don't think any interviewer does that.
M:well when u join the company I don't know whether I am at BBSR or sumhere else??
and morever none of your friends have asked me my name...
(he wanted this..I knew I was in...I should ask him his name)
me:SIR i know your name sir,already saw that from your ID .
M:(smiled)Should I ASK U MORE???
me:I gave him a smile which showed him my reluctance.
M:well you can leave.
(in between each and every question he tried to stress me out with some senetence or the other,total time the interview was conducted was for 45 minutes)
I came out,people asked what were my questions
I shouted DES,IDEA ,BLOWJOB(fish),hahahaha ,some girls looked at me ,i again shouted BLOWJOB ..
a madam came to me asked me whether i had finished ...
me:"finished with what???" (BLOWJOB????) again my friends were laughing .
maam:ur interview,if yes,then get out.
...well its a kind of reputation only SAHOO CHAT can get.
When the RESULTS were announced I was in....but in between there were 10 hours of waiting..but thats another story....hahhaha bbye for now.